Handcuffs Seem a Tad Unnecessary

by A Bird Among Men

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about

This album is what happens when I put more than an hour and a half of work into something. It's slightly less mediocre than the last EP.

credits

released October 16, 2015

I made this.

Album Art: James Coyne

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all rights reserved

about

A Bird Among Men Bath, Maine

Tongue in cheek, self deprecating folk punk from mid-coast Maine!

I started this project because I don't have enough friends to make a real punk band.

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Track Name: The Cynical Approach
Well we like to think that we are so far above everything around us and,
We are not animals, no, we are something different
But the truth is that we have not rid ourselves of those instincts at all,
And given the chance back into a primal beast, we all will fall.

Because humans are full of some real dark desires
And as soon as their reason retires
They will all come flooding right back out again.
This idea of humanity
has been constructed so that we
don't have to admit that we are all the same.

Yeah, you and me and the murderer
who lives right down the street from here
We're all human no matter how much you complain
The CEO, the communist
The dictator with an iron fist.
We are one, yes we are all the same.

It's not the goodness in our heart
That really sets our species apart,
People are locked up and they are gunned down every day.
The biggest difference here is that we are all ashamed,
That we all still partake in nature's ways.

Nobody wants the best for anybody but themselves.
It gets proven again and again.
People smashing others down, so that they may be higher up
But I am still hoping for the day when,

We all at least acknowledge that we are all, deep down, animals.
We have not risen above nature yet.
I'm not saying it's impossible, but come on let's all face the facts,
There's a long way to go if that's where we want to get.
Track Name: Fuck Your Dreams
So you wanna make something cool?
Something no ones ever seen before?
Well suck it up kid, because you're doomed to fail and end up working in a convenience store
Just find a big audience, and give them what they want.
More of the same is sure to make them happy, don't even worry about being caught, because


Originality doesn't pay
So I'll just copy other artists
That's all people want to hear anyway.
So take a lyric from here
And a melody from there,
Throw them together
No one really cares.

They'd all just rather stay
In their shells and listen to something familiar,
than hear what you have to say.
Just give up.
Don't try anything experimental
It'll just make everyone uncomfortable
And really fucking temperamental.

Originality doesn't pay
So I'll just copy other artists
That's all people want to hear anyway.
So take a lyric from here
And a melody from there,
Throw them together
No one really cares.


Yeah, all that bullshit about it coming from the heart,
Is just that.
Because music isn't about art,
It's about making fucktons of money.
Made up by people who just couldn't make it.

Originality doesn't pay
So I'll just copy other artists
That's all people want to hear anyway.
So take a lyric from here
And a melody from there,
Throw them together
No one really cares.
Track Name: Graduation
I've spent the past four years
Talking to the same three people
And now it's too much just to bear
Cause I'm the only one who knows where to go from here
I don't wanna go
But it's what I have to do
I know through the rest of my life
I'll never forget a single one of you

But I'm moving on
Out of my hometown
Away from everyone I've ever known
And ever loved
By tomorrow I'll be gone
But I won't take this lying down
I'll hold on to all of the memories
Cause they're all that I've got left

As the shipyards fade into the distance
I don't know what to feel
On the one hand I am filled with joy
And not a single bit of this seems real
But then I remember all the ones
Who got me this far
I wonder what they'd think
And as I skip town, I wonder where they are

But I'm moving on
Out of my hometown
Away from everyone I've ever known
And ever loved
By tomorrow I'll be gone
But I won't take this lying down
I'll hold on to all of the memories
Cause they're all that I've got left

Nothing can stop me now
Cause I am on my own
There is nobody left who can tell me where to go
Nothing can stop me now
Cause I am on my own
Oh yes, I am on my own

But I'm moving on
Out of my hometown
Away from everyone I've ever known
And ever loved
By tomorrow I'll be gone
But I won't take this lying down
I'll hold on to all of the memories
Cause they're all that I've got left
Track Name: Adolescent Male in a Dark Hoodie
You see young Johnny on the street
Think he's innocent as can be
But don't let yourself be decieved
CAUSE HE'S A CRIMINAL

Because you gotta take it from me
If they're under 23
Then the only possibility
IS THEY'RE A CRIMINAL

All young people are criminals
With their mari-juh-juanas and their punk rock songs
Yeah all young people are criminals
So control them before they control us.

They're dangerous to our way of life
From which our prosperity is derived
Yeah they're gonna cause us nothing but strife
BECAUSE THEY'RE CRIMINALS

So throw them all into the machine
With your help we can make them all clean
Because their refusal to fit in means
THAT THEY ARE CRIMINALS

All young people are criminals
With their mari-juh-juanas and their punk rock songs
Yeah all young people are criminals
So control them before they control us.

Teenager wearing black?
Criminal
No matter how you try do they bounce right back?
Criminal
If they even hesitate
Criminal
So mothers and fathers do not sit and wait.
Your kids a criminal.

Because if we start to allow
What they are doing here and now
Panic and chaos they will endow
BECAUSE THEY'RE CRIMINALS

So lock them up and give them drugs
To break through the apathetic shrugs
They're all liars, thieves and thugs.
BECAUSE THEY'RE CRIMINALS

All young people are criminals
With their mari-juh-juanas and their punk rock songs
Yeah all young people are criminals
So control them before they control us.

All young people are criminals
With their mari-juh-juanas and their punk rock songs
Yeah all young people are criminals
So control them before they control us.
Track Name: It's On The To-Do List
Another day, another deadline
But I know I'll never do what needs done on time
Because my subconscious always finds something better
To distract myself from the reality of life
And it's driving me insane
Just whatever is keeping me from being productive in my brain
So I'll sit and rot away on my couch
Watching TV and there is nothing left to say

Because why do today
What I can put off until tomorrow and then not do anyway
Why do I stay
Sedentary and just let my train of thought run astray

It always comes back
And bites me in the ass
And teaches me to regret what I have done
Or what I haven't done
Yeah, it comes around
And slams me into the ground
And on my morale does a bombing run

Well I can never just stay focused
I jump from thought to thought like a bullfrog on caffeine
Constantly going through the same
Random tangent routine
Honestly, I'm only writing this
To get out of doing Spanish
Killing the next 20 minutes
Is something that I think that I can manage

Because why do today
What I can put off until tomorrow and then not do anyway
Why do I stay
Sedentary and just let my train of thought run astray

It always comes back
And bites me in the ass
And teaches me to regret what I have done
Or what I haven't done
Yeah, it comes around
And slams me into the ground
And on my morale does a bombing run

A bridge is just a way of stalling until the next chorus
When you have something else to say
But I just want to get this stupid song over with
So I will whittle away.
Track Name: Netflix Never Made Me Watch a RomCom
They say that being a musician
Makes it easy to get women
But I am walking proof
That saying is fucking bullshit
I had a girl in my bed once,
I went into tremors,
She got up and walked away.
So much for that one.

I fall asleep alone
Every night.
Yeah I'm the king of virgins
And that's alright.
Who needs a girlfriend
When you've got Netflix,
And world of Warcraft?

Yeah I'm not impressive
I don't drive, I'm out of shape
And I'm not in a band.
So that leaves me with the choice
Of my left or right hand.
At least I've got no self esteem,
So if you want to get back at your exboyfriend,
You could pretend to go out with me.

I fall asleep alone
Every night.
Yeah I'm the king of virgins
And that's alright.
Who needs a girlfriend
When you've got Netflix,
And world of Warcraft?

At least I have friends online,
To fool me into thinging I'm popular
At least some of the time.
Yeah the Internet can provide
All the sexual satisfaction I'll ever need
And because it's not alive,
I'll never have to give it anything. Ever.
Track Name: The Violent Pacifist
It's funny how you think you can know someone
And have no idea who they are at all
I'm standing here wide-eyed and slackjawed
As you're letting me take the fall
And you're not helping when you say
All I have to do is simply buck up
You've gotta stop thinking you're Jesus
Cause Jesus, man. It's so fucked up.

We'll pretend that it's okay
That you've done nothing wrong today
But I am sure your plan will be
To pin this all on me

Now you've been figured out
And everybody knows what you've been doing for all these years
They're all turning against you
Your best friends have become a bunch of mutineers
So you'll scream and you'll shame
Never understanding that you are the one to blame for this
You say that you're mellow
But we all know you're the kind of fellow who solves things with his fists

We'll pretend that it's okay
That you've done nothing wrong today
But I am sure your plan will be
To pin this all on me
You are not who you say you are
You've sure left an ugly scar
I'll be sure to remember you
For all of the bullshit you spew

We'll pretend that it's okay
That you've done nothing wrong today
But I am sure your plan will be
To pin this all on me
Track Name: Rick for Prez
America is in shambles,
Seems that we've lost our way
We need a new kind of leader
One who will blow all the others away.
So vote for Richard of Gloucester,
He's sure to get things done.
He'll kick those "non-patriots" into gear, at the end of a gun.
No longer will this be the winter of our discontent. He doesn't give a shit whether you said what you meant.

Richard for President,
Richard for President,
The other candidates are dirty milk-drinkers
Rick for Prez.
Track Name: A Scrap of Paper and a Handshake
They say high school is the best time of our lives
But I have spent the past four years thinking of just how exactly I
Could get out of doing anything exceptional
So rather than loving everything, I find it all regrettable.

I never did anything to set myself apart
Inhibitions and excuses were by bodyguards
If I could do it all again
I would not have backed myself right into this corner, right into this pen.

I should've joined the football team
But the other kids would have killed me
And I should've started taking art
But I can hardly draw a pie chart
I should've tried out for a play
I say all this to my dismay
Yeah I should've done so much more
But as it stands, high school was a bore

Well my freshman year I did,
Actually how about we skip ahead a little bit
Straight to my sophomore year where I definitely did much more
Actually you could call me an activity conquistador.

Yes I did so many things
So many things I wrote a song about them, just had to sing.
Oh, you want to know just what they were?
Hang on a sec, I just remembered, yo no hablo ingles monsieur.

I should've joined the football team
But the other kids would have killed me
And I should've started taking art
But I can hardly draw a pie chart
I should've tried out for a play
I say all this to my dismay
Yeah I should've done so much more
But as it stands, high school was a bore

When I was a junior well I sang for some people I guess
I still did nothing nonetheless
Now I am a senior standing here
I guess getting involved will have to wait until I go to college next year

I should've joined the football team
But the other kids would have killed me
And I should've started taking art
But I can hardly draw a pie chart
I should've tried out for a play
I say all this to my dismay
Yeah I should've done so much more
But as it stands, high school was a bore

High school was a bore
And I'm done with it.